Who I am.

A year ago, I honestly could not stand who I was. 

I hated that I wasn’t the person everyone wanted to hang out. That I wasn’t a favorite. That I wasn’t like everybody else.

I go into a room full of people, and when I am talking, I am totally awkward.

I hated that about myself.

I was in a room full of people though today, and I noticed something had changed.

I no longer hate that I am awkward. 

When I’m talking to people, I talk so fast that I mess up my words. I’m now okay with that.

Sometimes, I am completely different from people in the room. I am now okay with that.

I have people who love me for me. A husband who laughs at the things I say, who loves me for being awkward. A family who thinks that I am the funniest person alive just because I am awkward.

Another thing I have realized: 

I love food.

I know this seems like a no brainer, but seriously I love food.

I say to someone, ” I love cooking” and they say, “Oh, me too!” and I want to say, “no, no, I LOVE cooking!”

I love reading about the science of food, the nutritional break down of food.

I love reading about people who have turned their passion into food and made into helping people.

That’s what I want to do.

It inspires me so much. 

Maybe someday, my awkward self will be cooking for people in Africa.

Maybe someday, my beautiful awkward self I’ll own a raw chocolate factory that only uses fair trade cocoa beans.

Someday, if I want it to happen, it will. 

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